SPECULATION! Everyone is making a case for their team to get Peyton Manning. I make the case for 31 teams to sign Manning.
Bears - Jay Cutler has diabetes, Peyton Manning does not. Anytime Jay's sugar gets low, (or high, whichever kind he has) Peyton can come in.
Bengals - Andy Dalton needs a mentor, Peyton runs the show and then after Marvin's contract is up, boom, new head coach.
Bills - Yea, they just gave Ryan Fitzpatrick a ton of money, so what? That's like marrying your high school sweetheart, then a smokin' hot cougar down on her luck comes to you in need of a friend.
Broncos - Deep down, Elway wants to get rid of Tebowmania. How do you get rid of football Jesus? Football God!
Buccaneers - No state income tax, plus, he can pull a reverse Tony Dungy this way.
Browns - The Browns are losing the RG3 sweepstakes, so why not go after an older, whiter version of a franchise QB?
Cardinals - Weak division, dome stadium, stud QB. Peyton might actually play here!
Chargers - Peyton is a huge Anchorman fan. If he comes to San Diego, he can grow out a mustache and begin his transition to the news desk.
Chiefs - The last time Matt Cassel backed up a stud QB, that guy set NFL records. Can Peyton repeat that? KC wants to find out!
Cowboys - Jerry Jones says he loves Tony Romo, but that's before Manning was there. Romo becomes the Jennifer Aniston to Peyton's Angelina. Yea, I made a dated US Weekly reference, it's my blog.
Dolphins - No state income tax, beautiful weather, and a decent team. The NFL likes it too, because it gives us Brady-Manning twice a year.
Eagles - Mike Vick gets hurt all the time, Manning would be the ultimate back up, if not closer. The Eagles can alternate Manning and Vick, good luck with that, NFL!
Falcons - Another dome. Peyton likes domes. Matty Ice isn't getting it done in the big games, Peyton can win a title in Atlanta.
49ers - Montana, Young, Manning? An upgrade from Alex Smith to Peyton Manning could be the difference from NFC title game and Super Bowl Champion.
Giants - Manning and Manning? What a team! It would be like Jordan and Carson, only both guys are good and people like them.
Jaguars - Peyton gets no state income tax, a chance to whip Andrew Luck twice, and instantly become the most famous person ever in Jacksonville.
Jets - Both Mannings in New York! Brady versus Manning twice a year! Jet fans get another QB to rip on! Lots of excitement!
Lions - Stafford seems like the guy of the future, but couldn't Manning come in and throw 6,000 yards to Megatron?
Packers - The reverse Favre. Aaron Rogers is good to go down or sit out a game or two. Matt Flynn had a big game there, what do you think Manning could do in garbage time?
Panthers - Cam Newton is Superman, sure, but Peyton is the World's Greatest Detective, Batman. If they added Robin (Chad Ochocinco), Aquaman (Somebody no one cares about) and Wonder Woman (Lee Evans) they could assemble the Super Friends!
Patriots - If you can't beat 'em, join 'em? It would be like Hulk Hogan and Randy Savage as the Mega Powers. With Giselle as Miss Elizabeth. Will Peyon get jealous eyes?
Raiders - There is always a chance that Carson Palmer could retire.
Rams - Dome stadium! Did I tell you that Peyton likes domes? Sam Bradford isn't the man, yet, if ever. Peyton gives them a fighting chance in a bad division and lets Bradford learn under someone who knows what he's doing.
Ravens - The Colts left Baltimore for Indy, could Manning leave Indy for Baltimore? A reverse Mayflower! Plus, this is actually a team that needs to win now, and Manning could bring it for them. Before Ray Lewis murders someone. (again)
Redskins - The Redskins are like the kid in school that owned the Jaguar, Virtual Boy, and Power Glove, too much money and always tried to be cool. Well what's cooler than a big name QB? Nothing. Plus, have you seen their QBs?
Saints - Dome! His dad played there. They throw the $%&^ out of the ball, and Drew Brees might be on his way out. Peyton could make his last horrah in a homecoming of sorts.
Seahawks - Marshawn Lynch is becoming the Skittles pitchman. With Peyton Manning as his teacher, soon Lynch could be selling other candies, like Starbursts, Junior Mints, and Mentos (the freshmaker). Basically anything but Heath bars. Nobody likes those.
Steelers - Rumors are rampant that Peyton Manning worships the devil, if he went to Pittsburgh, it would prove those rumors.
Texans - Dome! Two chances to stick it to Indy. A GREAT team, with an injury prone QB. Peyton could take that team to the Superbowl while Matt Schaub's brittle bones harden.
Titans - A Tennessee reunion. The Titans would probably change their unis to orange for a year. With Chris Johnson in the backfield, they could make a decent run and whoop the Colts twice. Rocky Top!
Vikings - A washed up veteran QB? You bet the Vikings are interested! A dome, (you already know) a stud in AP, and a new stadium give Minnesota three reasons to go after Peyton.
